“You’re going to throw a party for me?” “Yes we are…for your seventh birthday.” “But that’s not for months.” “I think your concept of time is…well, not skewed so much as it’s striking me as age-appropriate.” (Think about it, fifteen minutes is an eternity for these things! I mean, children.) Annie spoke up, “Lyd, you turn seven in two weeks.” Her eyes grew (she’s not entirely sure how long two weeks is) She gasped, (nope, “two weeks” is an abstract…
From Facebook, November, 2009 People who bring their dogs with them to Petworld must have the same feeling of legitimacy that I feel bringing Lydia to Babies R Us Upon entry, we nearly held Lyd up for the store to see her. “Look here! We have a baby. Last time we were here we did not have a baby. But now we do have a baby. Make way for a proud Mama and Papa! Coming through! See? See? We have…
This morning was going perfectly. Lyd was ready and was enjoying her morning free-time. Regina had not yet taken off her shoes and socks, it was looking like it was going to be a great bike ride for the girls to school this morning. All we have to do is be out the door at 7:45. Then… 7:30am “Lyd? What’s this in your backpack? Is this Homework? Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!” “What’s ‘Whiskey Tango Foxtrot’ Daddy?” “I’ll tell you when you’re…
This morning Lydia wrote a “test” for me. Here it is: “A test? Okay. Just so you know, I didn’t really study for it, so please consider that in the curve. Okay?” “Sure sure, I’ll help you with the tough ones. So, here’s what you do. You need to look at the word and tell me what it is.” “Okay…so where’s the word?” “It’s not a written word silly.” “Uhm…but I’m supposed to read this?” “Oh, that’s not such a…
One morning back in July, Regina finished her breakfast. I wiped her face and told her it’s time for a bath. “I want a Bubble Bath Daddy.” “Bubble Bath? Sure!” I opened the bathroom cabinet and the bottle was empty. “Oh. I’m sorry Hun, we’re all out of bubble bath.” Regina, being who she is, had to check the bottle herself. Cue the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree music. Cue naked toddler with her chin touching her chest. Saddest. Bath. Ever….
“All right kids! Way to hustle!” I looked up, satisfied to see Lyd hustling and not staring at the sky. It’s just a pre-game practice. Time to take it easy for a few minutes, now where in this bag did I put my Kindle? I looked over at one of Lyd’s teammates’ Moms. She brought her laptop. Smart! I could be writing right now! Ugh. Actually no. It’s just enough day light out here where I’d be struggling to read…
“Daddy! I want Privacy!” (actually, what I heard was “Pwie-Vuh-See”) (Be enthusiastic Brooks, be encouraging. Use your high pitched voice. You can do this!) “Okay. First, you don’t know what privacy is, you just recognize that privacy happens behind closed doors (actually, I suppose you do know what privacy is after all). Second, the last time I decided to ‘grant’ you a bit of privacy, I ended up re-rolling 2/3 of a roll of Toilet Paper.” Awkward silence passes before…
One night after we put the girls to bed we decided to watch a little grown-up television. “Wanna watch some Paranormal Witness?” “Sure!” We were properly frightened. The scary face happened, we both jumped. Luckily we lived through it. But what should be considered more impressive was that we didn’t fall asleep on the couch. Staying awake on the couch equals a high-five. We did it! There was no way we’d make it through a second one, definitely time for…
Before I start this story, I just want to publicly congratulate my wife Annie, she’s been working very hard on a tightly monitored diet and exercise program, and she has enjoyed great results. She has officially attained a weight she hasn’t seen since before becoming a mother. There have been a few lessons learned along the way, one of them being exercise equipment. If the price is too good to be true, then it is not good at all. We…
Meh, Olympics. Whatever. The whole thing is too hyped up. I’ve got things to do, I’m busy, and I have better things to watch during my free time. Now let’s look for something to watch… News, Jeopardy, ugh…there it is. The stupid Olympics. Looks like swimming. Hmm, this is kind of close. I suppose I’ll see how this one turns out. If for no other reason, I won’t be totally out of the loop. Wow…this is looking like a really…