I could hear the stairs creaking. There was a small visitor approaching. She rounded the corner, it was Regina. “Oh! Hi Daddy!” She froze.
“Hey Hun!”
“Reggie! Did you wander upstairs?” Annie appeared next to Reg.
“Dad…Daddy has cream on his face.”
“That’s shaving cream.”
“Oh.” She then noticed the razor in my hand. “Daddy’s gonna brush his teeth.”
“No, he’s about to shave.”
“He’s gonna shave his teeth?”
Annie laughed. “No, he’s going to shave his face and get rid of his bristles.”
“Bwissles?”
“Yeah, he has to shorten the whiskers on his face and make it smooth. That way his face won’t be scratchy when he gives you kisses.”
Regina needed to learn more about this. Before I knew it she was standing on top of the toilet seat, having a hushed conversation with me. I have no idea why she feels the need to whisper these conversations, but it’s hard not to crack up.
“Why you naked Daddy?”
“I’m not naked! I’m wearing pajama pants.”
“Oh, right. I like your tattoos.”
“Thank you.”
“Why you bweeding?”
“I’m bleeding because I’m cheap and I will use my razor until it’s rusted crusted and as sharp as a butter knife.”
“Oh. I made you a cupcake! It’s chocolate!”
“Thank you sweetie!” She placed a toy cupcake next to the sink for me.
“Don’t eat it until you’re done shaving. Okay?”
“I promise.”
“Okay.” There was a long silence. “Bye Bye Daddy.” She slid off the toilet seat and wandered back down the stairs. “Mommy! I made Daddy a cupcake to eat when he’s done shaving his teeth!”